The World Association for the Advancement of Chimps today spoke out at claims that they are in fact related to or behind the Bush Presidency.
In a bid to distance themselves Prof McChimp provided pretty shocking proof," whilst we are 99% identical to humans genetically speaking we have tested George Bush Jr's DNA and found that he is in fact only 82% comparable to us.", the bespectacled primate began. "For years now we have been tied with the Bush Presidency, with his foolish and idiotic behaviour being linked to the stereotypical view of chimps - this evidence stops that", he went on to lambaste the Western media, "with few comparators of such gross idiocy in the human world the media were forced to look elsewhere to find similarities, and although he may look chimpesque, Bush's DNA is actually closer to that of Cyanochloronta or pond scum to you or me".
Prof McChimp speaks out
The world of science is bemused yet convinced by these findings, with several creationist sources arguing that evolution is not happening if their poster boy is actually devolving.
Rev Randy McFisty, of the Unified School of Creation, said, "look people how is everything 'evolving' if the President of the U.S. of A is actually 'devolving' according to your licentious 'science'? If God made the world then he made our president backwards for a reason - maybe something to do with Haliburton's belief in the power of prayer?".
Chimps worldwide now rest easy knowing that their name is clear and that no more monkey business will be carried out in their name.
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