Thursday 9 August 2007

alex salmonds own broadcasting network


support is growing for Alex Salmon's demands for his own broadcasting network from snp die hards.

Alex Salmon said, "for too long i have been denied my own voice in the mainstream media, for instance when i say things people should then hear them repeated in live streaming 24 hour a day Salmon news. Every day i find i am sidelined as a minor politician." The solution the Scottish first minister proposes is a suite of channels made in Scotland by Scots for Scots, with all pervading almond media messages.

"look we all know how well the Scottish football team does - so lets make our own TV", said ramshackle former TV present Jock McJockly, "we have long been ignored as the funny ones with red hair and scurrilously stereotyped by Rab C Newsboy, Wee jimmy cranky, and worst of all bastarding supergran". the bewildered loner went on to say, "when i fronted the now iconic 70's TV show Uncle Jocks moving kilt Scottish TV had pride and really stirred up media coverage", Mr McJockly, did not divulge the nature of media coverage surrounding his show as, "those charges were never proven - nae back off ya bas tardin sass nakin who are".

The Salmon broadcasting network has a bevy of shows already in production:


  • Cant fry a mars bar, wont fry a mars bar - cooking show

  • cholesterol ridden heartbeat - Sunday night soporophory

  • the pie at night - astronomy show

  • booze women - lifestyle panel show

  • binge of the day - sports

  • chewin the fat bird - comedy

  • cheap date - game show

  • ant and Mac's Saturday night carry out - game show

  • jock's factor - talent show

  • Salmondnight - political discussion show

"the excitement was typified to me, by a young boy who came up to me and said, 'yae alreet thare pal, gonnae fek off befae i gonnae blade ya, ya numpty' - beautiful, trully beautiful", Mr Salmon said.

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